Cry - Confusion Rejection and You - The Enternal Marriage Dilemma #ATOZCHALLENGE - C (2026)

"I didn't sign up to be your housekeeper, I wanted to be your life partner," Meera hollered.

An indifferent Shirish kept tapping keys into his keyboard, not even looking up to acknowledge. Silence seemed to be his strongest weapon to show disapproval. Meera felt like she wasn't given a choice. She had to endure.

"Do you have any idea how difficult it gets for me at times? And I have nobody to speak with."

Anger was seething into Shirish's face but he didnt react. He continued to do what he was doing, growing increasingly hostile.  

The long spells of ignorance peppered her mostly homebound life with post lockdown work from home. She and Shirish seldom stepped out. For a five-year long marriage this kind of routine translated into boredom. For Meera. Was Shirish bored? Did she not matter to him anymore. That apart, why was he always out to impress others? Was she less important? Where did she fit into the scheme of things? When was the last time Shirish asked her what she wanted to do or where she wanted to go? The questions haunted her each time there were spells of giving each other the cold shoulder in the same room. Her overthinking persisted breaking her resilience from within. Something inside wanted to shake him up badly, just to make him acknowledge. Right now, even that seemed to be a task.

His phone rang again. The aunt who talked endlessly had called. Another hour would be lost to long and incessant chatter about life. Her pain would remain invalidated and unresolved. She too had things to say, but there was nobody to listen. The only conversations they ever had were what to cook, what needs fixing and what the maid didn’t clean and Meera had overlooked. The conversations were fraught with direct criticism about her housekeeping abilities and zero empathy. A tear escaped Meera’s eyes. 

"I could have been working in an IT firm all my life and not have gotten caught up in a marriage that apparently isn't working for either of us." She redressed to herself turning away, curling her long thick tressed into an unruly bun. Giving a side-eye to her slightly stodgy frame she walked up to the fridge, opened the door and helped herself to a cube of dark chocolate. The side-eye helped her negotiate her rational choice over the need to indulge. 

While savoring the chocolate her mind raced to that so-called family friend, Trisha, who always threw herself at Shirish shamelessly and claiming he was like a brother to her. The problem was not Trisha. The problem was Shirish not saying a word to her. Even Meera’s own mother told her to ignore Trisha. It wasn’t even a problem. But to Meera it meant one more betrayal. Her own mother  had sidelined her. The kitchen knife had a certain allure to it again. It was the only way she could deal with the pain and lonliness brewing inside her. She shut her teary eyes in despair praying in that one second to cleanse her life of all toxic influences. The whole world looked wrong. 

Aunty Usha for her longest tirades that Shirish listened to like he were a paid therapist. Aunty Usha had only redressals and advice to give. Try telling her something and she would clap back with denial. If you persisted, she'd think of innovative ways to put you down. How free was this person?

And Trisha. Althought Shirish should have told her off, and even her mother should have supported her, Meera felt Trisha had absolutely no boundaries when it came to people. Because she had none, she felt others didn't either. How mindless was this person?

And the realisation of Shirish being at the center of it all was painful. Her mind would explode with all the humiliation she had borne silently because Shirish never spoke. The thoughts circled in her head, not allowing her to focus. Her mind raced back to the time when Trisha had made an impromptu visit like she had rights on Shirish's time and life. The two had such loud conversations that she couldnt focus on her work. A stalled deadline was following by a prematurely cancelled contract. In her mind, Meera felt Shirish didn't deserve the extra income. All of this was karma. 

And in parting, Trisha had said that four people were yet to accept the invite but their dinner plan was on. She had assumed Meera had accepted. Did Shirish accept on her behalf? Should he have? Did she lack the basic courtesy to ask her? Any one, or maybe all of these. 

In her heart, Meera hoped she would never have to interact with any of these intruders ever. For now, they seemed wilful and intrusive.

"Why am I really unhappy," she solliloquied. "What exactly is missing? Would it help if I broke the monotony for a bit? Would it wire my thinking differently? Would it make me less dependent on Shirish for validation?" 

She lodged the key in the engine of her i10 car and headed for a solo trip to Kamsheth.

It was still the wee hours in the morning and Shirish was in deep slumber. He would awaken to find her missing and grumble his way through his morning routine. Today, she would thankfully miss all of that.  She sped past the highway cutting through the pollution and finally landed in cleaner, greener, cooler air. There was a certain inviting charm to them. Sometihng that beckoned her to unwind. She breathed in long and hard and exhaled all her grief in one long breathe. Tugging at her bag pack she walked in to the reasort and checked in. The soft foam bed soaked in her tiredness of working long hours and she slept till late into the after noon. She woke up to 2 missed calls. No urgency there! She went back into the room to take a warm soak in the bath tub adding several aroma essences. After ordering her favorite most relaxing chamomile and hibiscus cocktail, she decided to venture into the hills. A furry friend walked up to her and cuddled into her arms. It seemed to want someone to bond, just like she did. She realised what was different here. They had totally submitted themselves to each other. Neither wanted anything more than the friendship. Maybe that was the missing link. In wanting too much perfection in their lives, they had forgotten to celebrate the very foundation--the friendship that got them together.

She headed back with Shirish’s favourite chocolate walnut fudge. He too guilt ridden at having ignored her.

"I am not as vocal as you are. I have an innate fear of saying things that might take things downhill. I am hence avoidant. But I didn't think it affected you so much, Meera."

The realisation hit Meera that Shirish was generally very inexpressive and could not articulate his feelings the way she did. She went up to him and gave him the warmest hug. She had missed him a good deal in the trip. He melted instantly just like the fudge in the summer heat. A conversation that both longed for took shape.

"Trisha is so immature. I feel I shouldnt try to hard to explain things to her. It will go above her head anyways. So I let her have her way. I know she is a bit pushy, but she comes here only for a while and then gets on with her life. So may as well let it go."

"Aunty's story is the same as yours. She too struggles for validation. I am probably the only person who acknowledges her. She talks mostly and all I need to do is listen and do my work alongside. If she's happy, her family is happy. So the bigger picture is pretty."

"Oh! I understand you were working towards a very strong deadline and it was very difficult for you. Does you arm still hurt, Shirish?"

Shirish stretched out the arm and Meera applied the herbal ointment. He made her a warm cup of black coffee in the exact proportions she liked the most. He didn't ignore her. Never! 

They savoured the creamy dessert together rekindling a love that did not need reassurance. It would always be there no matter the distance or the distractions.

"The next trip we are going together. No cellphones, okay, Mee."

Meera giggled shaking her head in assent.